The idea is that you come to realise that thoughts come and go of their own accord and that your conscious self is distinct from your thoughts.You can now direct your thoughts in a more positive way. This realisation is encouraged by a gentle question and answer sessions modelled on those in cognitive therapy.

Depression and anxiety hijack our attention. We all tend to bring to the forefront of our minds the thoughts and feelings that relfect our current mood. If you are sad, depressed or anxious then you tend to remember the bad things that have happened to you and not the good. This drives us deeper into a downward spiral and that leads from sadness into a deeper depression. Mindful meditation prevents and breaks that spiral.

A typical meditation:

1. Sit upright in a straight backed chair with your feet flat on the floor with your spine an inch from the back of the chair, or on the floor with your legs crossed.

2. Close your eyes. Use your mind to watch your breath as it flows in and out. Observe your sensations without judgement. Do not try to alter your breathing. Just pay attention to your breath.

3. After a while your mind may wander. If so gently bring your attention back to your breath. The act of realising that your mind has wandered – and bringing your attention back – is the key thing.

4. Your mind will eventually become calm.

5. Repeat every day for 20 – 30 minutes.

   
   

   An excellent website is: www.getsomeheadspace.com

A = ATTENTION or focus - is the glass half full or half empty? Both are true but where is your Attention. Be grateful for all the wonderful things you DO have in your life and pay attention to the abundance of nature – spring flowers, longer days, the sun shine as well as your other gifts.

B = Body - everything you do with your body affects your moods. The way you stand, breathing, drinking plenty of water to stay hydrated, exercise, smiling – everything. Try jumping with sadness!! See it doesn’t work does it!  So eat the correct food, move, smile, lift your head and feel better immediately.

C = Communication – how your talk to yourself and how you talk to others affects how you feel. Monitor your words and weed out any negative ones. Replace – I can’t with I can; replace not enough with I always have enough; so replace self talk of lack with abundance. Refuse to enter the downward spiral of the media and friends when discussing the CC! Talk to yourself as you would a beloved person in your life.

Remember too that each day that passes in one LESS day of the CC; every day we re moving towards an upturn, towards abundance.

Yes! ABC beats the CC every time!!

To help you get to know yourself find out whether you are motivated by moving towards a goal or away from a certain situation. This comes down to pain vs pleasure.

Pain people wait until the situation is SO bad, the bank balance is in the red, they become ill or their relationships are suffering.

While pleasure people will make sure they are always comfortable with the amount of money they have, the take care of their diets and exercise to ensure good health and address situations in their relationships as they occur.

So ask yourself a questions. What do you want from your holiday?

If your reply is – I am so tired I need to relax and recharge my batteries or similar – you could be an away from person.

On the other hand if you say – I am looking forward to experiencing the sun, food and nature in the country. This may show you to be a towards person.

Why bother you may ask? This is important in goal setting. You need to know whether you are motivated by pleasure or pain when setting your goals. A combination of both is excellent but remember to add the relevant aspect to your goals setting now you have found out where your motivation comes from.

Good luck. Let me know how well you get on: sue@suekennedy.com.

Consider the following - I offered you a £1m – all you have to do is arrive at a certain destination 3 hours away to collect it in person – what would you do to get it? You have to collect it yourself and if you are even one second late the deal if off. What time would you set off to collect it? Right now? Yes most would.

What if you encountered terrible traffic jams, all the roads are shut for 24 hours? What then? Would you turn round and hire a helicopter? How much effort would you put into getting to that destination and collecting the £1m?

Contrast the effort of the above with an appointment with your doctor, dentist or even a colleague and you get stuck in the same kind of terrible traffic what do you do? Turn around and re-schedule?

What is the motivation that drives us to do ANYTHING to get our goals? It is the purpose, the why. If the purpose/why is strong enough we will find a how.  If we know the result we will find a how to get it.

A compelling WHY will be linked to our personal objectives, our beliefs, our purpose in life. These act as a support mechanism to propel you towards your goals. Align your goals with your beliefs and you will achieve them.  Motivated people align their goals and their beliefs and so do anything to get them.

Look at your goals and find out whether they lined up with someone else’s beliefs and if so change them so you are motivated towards your own goals and beliefs.

Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment. Jim Rohn

The only thing even in this world are the number of hours in a day. The difference in winning or losing is losing is what you do with those hours. Woody Hayes

The bad news is time flies. The good news is you are the pilot. Michael Altshuler

Success and failure. We think of them as opposites, but they’re really not. They are companions – the hero and the sidekick. Laurence Shames

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass…it’s about learning how to dance in the rain. Unknown

Sometimes the best helping hand you can get is a good, firm push. Joann Thomas

Feedback is the breakfast of champions. Rick Tate

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again more intelligently. Henry Ford

The nose of the bulldog is slanted backwards so he can continue to breathe without letting go. Winston Churchill

You can have anything you want in life if you just help enough other people get what they want. Zig Ziglar

Dig the well before you are thirsty. Chinese Proverb

Knowledge is power, but enthusiasm pulls the switch. Ivern Ball

Do the thing you fear, and the death of fear is certain. Ralph Waldo Emerson

The idea is that you come to realise that your thoughts come and go of their own accord and that your conscious self is distinct from your thoughts. Using meditation you can change your thoughts. This realisation is encouraged by gentle question and answer sessions modelled on on those is cognitive therapy. 

Depression and anxiety hijack our attention. We all tend to bring to the forefront of our minds the thoughts and feelings that reflect our current mood. If you are sad, depressed or anxious then you tend to remember the bad things that have happened to you and not the good. This drives us into a downward spiral and that leads from sadness into a deeper depression. Mindful meditation prevents and breaks that spiral. 

A typical meditation: 

1.    Sit upright in a straight backed chair with your feet flat on the floor with your spine an inch from the back of the chair, or on the floor with your legs crossed.

2.    Close your eyes. Use your mind to watch your breath as it flows in and out. Observe your sensations without judgement. Do not try to alter your breathing.

3.    After a while your mind will wander. Gently bring your attention back to your breath. The act of realising that your mind has wandered – and bringing your attention back – is the key thing.

4.    Your mind will eventually become calm.

5.    Repeat every day for 20 – 30 minutes. 

Sue Kennedy is a Holistic Coach who has worked with people just like you and helped them get back on track.  Call her now to find out more. Tel: 020 88924548.
 

www.emptynesterworkshops.co.uk

Remember that we all have the same 24 hours and if you make your health your number one priority you will find the time to eat healthily and exercise appropriately.

To find out whether health is your number one priority/value do the following exercise:

• Think of all the things that are important to you in your life; the things you love and the things you like to do; then write them down;
• Then think of all those things you have listed and think what life would be like if you didn’t have your health. If you were in pain, couldn’t breathe properly, were ill in hospital.

If you couldn’t do what you wanted, even small things like getting out of a chair, walking in the park, going on your holidays, shopping and meeting loved ones. The actor Christopher Reeve said that before his accident he never gave his legs a thought, he was never grateful for getting out of a chair and walking across the room. After his accident he said he would have given ANYTHING to be able to those things we take for granted.

Nothing is fun or enjoyable when you are not well. This will help you realise how important your health is.

Do some small daily exercise – even 10 minutes a day – eating at least one healthy meal a day will begin to get you on track.

Take care of yourself now. Not having enough time is just an excuse. You can make time for the things and people you love so make time for yourself. Take care of yourself NOW.

Take the time to really nurture yourself. Love yourself and you will find that you have enough time.

TIME by Arnold Bennett

Philosophers have explained space. They have not explained time. It is
the inexplicable raw material of everything. With it, all is possible;
without it, nothing. The supply of time is truly a daily miracle, an
affair genuinely astonishing when one examines it. You wake up in the
morning, and lo! your purse is magically filled with twenty-four hours
of the unmanufactured tissue of the universe of your life! It is
yours. It is the most precious of possessions. A highly singular
commodity, showered upon you in a manner as singular as the commodity
itself!

For remark! No one can take it from you. It is unstealable. And no
one receives either more or less than you receive.

Talk about an ideal democracy! In the realm of time there is no
aristocracy of wealth, and no aristocracy of intellect. Genius is
never rewarded by even an extra hour a day. And there is no
punishment. Waste your infinitely precious commodity as much as you
will, and the supply will never be withheld from you. No mysterious
power will say:–”This man is a fool, if not a knave. He does not
deserve time; he shall be cut off at the meter.” It is more certain
than consols, and payment of income is not affected by Sundays.
Moreover, you cannot draw on the future. Impossible to get into debt!
You can only waste the passing moment. You cannot waste to-morrow; it
is kept for you. You cannot waste the next hour; it is kept for you.

I said the affair was a miracle. Is it not?
You have to live on this twenty-four hours of daily time. Out of it
you have to spin health, pleasure, money, content, respect, and the
evolution of your immortal soul. Its right use, its most effective
use, is a matter of the highest urgency and of the most thrilling
actuality. All depends on that. Your happiness–the elusive prize
that you are all clutching for, my friends!–depends on that. Strange
that the newspapers, so enterprising and up-to-date as they are, are
not full of “How to live on a given income of time,” instead of “How to
live on a given income of money”! Money is far commoner than time.
When one reflects, one perceives that money is just about the commonest
thing there is. It encumbers the earth in gross heaps.

If one can’t contrive to live on a certain income of money, one earns a
little more–or steals it, or advertises for it. One doesn’t
necessarily muddle one’s life because one can’t quite manage on a
thousand pounds a year; one braces the muscles and makes it guineas,
and balances the budget. But if one cannot arrange that an income of
twenty-four hours a day shall exactly cover all proper items of
expenditure, one does muddle one’s life definitely. The supply of
time, though gloriously regular, is cruelly restricted.

Which of us lives on twenty-four hours a day? And when I say “lives,”
I do not mean exists, nor “muddles through.” Which of us is free from
that uneasy feeling that the “great spending departments” of his daily
life are not managed as they ought to be? Which of us is quite sure
that his fine suit is not surmounted by a shameful hat, or that in
attending to the crockery he has forgotten the quality of the food?
Which of us is not saying to himself–which of us has not been saying
to himself all his life: “I shall alter that when I have a little more
time”?

We never shall have any more time. We have, and we have always had,
all the time there is. It is the realisation of this profound and
neglected truth (which, by the way, I have not discovered) that has led
me to the minute practical examination of daily time-expenditure.

Let me know how well you do – email me – sue@suekennedy.com.

While you lie on the beach, by a pool or climb a mountain this summer – let your mind think about what you desire in your life. Really dare to dream. Then bring yourself back to the present – measure whether you are on track to attain your goals. If not think about what you need to do NOW to get back on track. As Keith Cunningham says his lectures and in Keys of the Vault - small steps taken consistently each day will get you from where you are now to where you want to be.

Each night as you clean your teeth review your day. If you are on track – great. If not decide NOW to get back on track.

Let me know how well you do.

Have a great summer, dare to dream and attain those dreams.